Life with Sam and Eli: have you seen my husband?

For those who are learning to be parents, and are along on this ride with us...

holy hell, when is it time to get off?

Or maybe just get off and regroup, and then get back on?

I have a few friends who used to tell me (all the time),

enjoy ONE when you only have ONE.

You can never understand how much harder it is when you have TWO.

1+1 does not equal 2.

I thought...

whatever. I got this.

My mom used to warn me that I would hate working full-time once I had kids.

whatever. not me.

flash forward present time and guess what?

they were all right.

whatever.

Eli is at such a fun age, but very high maintenance. Only eats when you stand by his side and remind him every 3 minutes to take a bite.

Only brushes his teeth (for me) when I sit on him.

Wants a waffle until you make the waffle. Then he wants cereal.

Until you pour the milk in, then he is eating the waffle.

Or the bun he saw you using to pack your lunch for work.

Sam is a low maintenance baby, only crying to eat and to have some help getting to sleep.

(and by help, I mean rock him and bounce him and shove the pacifier in his mouth every 30 seconds while shushing him and rubbing his head.)

Add that in with a notoriously running late mom, who has high hopes every morning to fit it all in. . . sleep til 6am, hitting snooze until 7am, exercise, shower, try on clothes until something fits, start a load of laundry, feed the cats, clean up xxx number of piles of cat puke, drink coffee (while still warm, which never ever happens.), check facebook (why? is that a priority??) and be ready and waiting for 2 smiley faces when they finally wake up between 830 and 930.

It's hard.

Especially when they don't wake up until 930 and I have to leave for work at 1030, and I see them for a whole hour before work.

(and part of that hour is spent sitting on Eli to brush his teeth, protecting Sam from Eli, begging Eli to eat his cereal, re-warming my coffee in the microwave, again.)

I cried on my way to work yesterday.

And then when I got to work when asked how my morning was.

Oh and have I mentioned that Mike and I haven't had more than a short conversation since last week sometime?

I thought it was a great idea to schedule my days off on his days to work, so we wouldn't need much babysitting help.

So when exactly does this get easier?

I want to know!