My soapbox

 Chances are, if you are here, it is on your own free will. 

This site is about Eli, but this post is about Postpartum Depression. 

So if you don't want to read on, you won't hurt my feelings. 

Well, and I won't even know anyway. 

Like it or not, I had postpartum depression. Postpartum depression sucks. 

I was NOT prepared for what came my way. 

I read EVERY baby book I could get my hands on when I was pregnant. 

I took NOTES from Babywise, for goodness sakes. 

Sleep train a baby, get him on a schedule. Right up my alley!

I knew every kind of diaper rash there was/how to treat it, what to do when tear ducts clog, how to deal with mastitis/engorgement, blah blah blah. 

P.S. -- none of that stuff happened anyway. 

Guess what chapters I skipped in EVERY book? The one about c-sections, and the one about baby blues/PPD. I never watched A Baby Story if the mom was having a c-section.  Boooring.

And really, no TV show/reality show even talks about PPD. 

Does anyone talk about it?

I'm not saying every mom needs to read those chapters, but I'm sure wishing this mom would have.

What do c-sections and PPD have to do with each other? 

Absolutely NOTHING (or maybe something? Did you know traumatic deliveries predispose you to PPD.) 

But for me, they were both things that I thought would never happen to me, and they both did. 

Some studies show 1 in 4 first-time mothers suffer from depressive symptoms caused by PPD. Even more have postpartum anxiety, adding up to total nearly 1 in 3. That is crazy!! 

It is estimated that 400,000 women in the US experience PPD each year, usually 6-8 weeks after childbirth. 

So why is it I had no idea what was happening to me?

Why is it that my doctor didn't recognize this?

Even though I had a TEXTBOOK case.

Why is it that once I recognized it, no ONE could help me!?

My doctor relied on ME for prescribing advice.

The first therapist I saw? 

She dug for information from my past, so sure I was molested as a child or had unresolved issues with my parents.

I turned to Dr. Google.

anxiety after childbirth

detachment from baby

insomnia

No help there either.

A lot of message boards with a lot of questions from moms with no answers.

I called a psychiatrist. or 2, or 3. 

We can see you in 6 weeks. 

6 weeks!????

I can't wait 6 hours.

What if I need help before then??

Ma'am, are you a danger to yourself or your child?

Well, I don't know. Am I?

And then I found POEM.

click here to watch.
POEM changed everything for me.

Most of you have NOT suffered postpartum depression and never will.

Many of you, whether you know it or not, know someone who has. 

That person may or may not talk about it.

For me, my experience changed me forever. 

I WANT to talk about it.

I am healthy now. But the vivid memory of it will forever be burned in my brain.

It has made me appreciate my "normal" life so much more.

It has made me a better wife, mother, daughter, pharmacist - all for different reasons. 

After all that long-winded-ness, I just really want to say -- awareness would have helped me out tremendously. 

The best thing for me was to know I wasn't alone.
The best day for me was when I found POEM.

I was not the first woman that ever felt this way.

POEM is in the Columbus area, but they have a network that reaches much much further. 

If this message can reach just one person, and make their suffering just one day shorter. . .

then I did my job. :)

So please share.

http://www.poemonline.org/